finally

I haven't read all of these yet, and I certainly do not agree with all of the authors' arguments, but this is some very useful reading. It's helped me find the people who seem like voices in the (Western media) wilderness on the story of what is happening in Israel and Gaza now.

Let me repeat (lest some of my relatives and friends never speak to me again): I do not agree with all of the points made in these pieces. But I must admit that I agree with most of them, at least thus far.

For one, I disagree with Chris Hedges that this is genocide. But I think he's absolutely right that Israel could not possibly do more damage than it is doing, not just to Gazans but to itself and the rest of us. He is totally right that Gaza has descended into complete chaos and that "out of that power vacuum will rise a new generation of angry jihadists, many of whom may spurn Hamas for more radical organizations" [emphasis added]. It seems inevitable that this slaughter will do more to popularize Hamas and to internally destabilize Israel's neighbors than any other Israeli action I can imagine.

I am stunned and nauseated by the willingness of most Jewish Israelis to support this horror. Yes, Hamas has been firing rockets. And I do not pretend to know what it's like to live under threat of rocket fire, or to have to comfort my children when they wake up screaming because they think a rocket is about to fall on their house, as my cousins in Jerusalem have to do these days.

But what seems to me a stark truth is that a rocket is not actually going to fall on my cousins' house in Jerusalem. Or at least, wasn't about to before Israel got a whole lot more people a whole lot more pissed off at it. That is, right now, an imagined threat. For Palestinians in Gaza, the threat is 100% real. That is the critical difference.

And there is no denying that Israel spent weeks leading up to this assault blockading Gaza so completely that gas, food, medicine, electricity, and almost anything else you might think of as necessary for basic survival were completely unavailable.

What would you do? I am entirely serious when I say that I would probably fire rockets too.

And we're supposed to believe that Israel is trying to avoid civilian Palestinian casualties? And that they are so smart and well-equipped as to be able to do so in one of the most packed urban slums in the world? The latter doesn't really matter when the former is such an obvious lie, I suppose, but if it did then one would wonder exactly how Israel today bombed the Gaza City United Nations headquarters. Way to expose your own lousy - yet shockingly effective - propaganda.

I'm not a believer in "an eye for an eye," but 1,100 Palestinian deaths (including ~300 children) vs. 13 Israeli deaths should give us pause, no matter how you slice it. Lots and lots and lots of pause. Especially when we consider the hell those 1,100 people and hundreds of thousands of their neighbors were being forced to live in even before Israel dropped bombs on them (see above: complete lack of basic necessities). It is not surprising to me that martyrdom, aka glorified suicide, has a strong attraction in such a situation.

Yet Israel and the United States have spun this incredible fairy tale in which submission to one's worst enemy leads to happyeverafter. Are we really supposed to believe - more importantly, are Palestinians really supposed to believe - that the answer to all their problems is to spontaneously rise up and overthrow their own government and then surrender to the people that are now attempting to obliterate the very foundations of their existence (I mean schools, hospitals and the UN at least as much as Hamas)? If that makes sense to you, I know this guy Bernard Madoff who has some great investments for you.

When I titled this post "finally" I was referring to finally finding some alternative voices on this subject, some writing that could help me think through and begin to articulate my own very muddled and anguished feelings about what is happening. I didn't realize it would also mean finally expressing those feelings in a long and angry blog post, but I'm glad it's turned out that way.

Not because I get satisfaction from any of this. I've been largely avoiding the topic here and elsewhere because my main reaction to it is, uncharacteristically, to want to cry. Sometimes it doesn't seem like there is any other logical reaction. So writing this out on my little blog that may a dozen people read regularly is somewhat cathartic, yes. But not satisfying.

I certainly don't feel like I am necessarily "right" or anyone else is necessarily "wrong." To think that would be to deny the massive complexities of a very, very old conflict and to shut out the possibility of hearing and understanding other perspectives. Which is, arguably, much of the reason we are in this mess.

I also don't feel really comfortable or confident about how the views I express here will be heard and understood by those dear to me who, I know, approach this topic very differently. Just how many of them read this blog, I don't really know. I hope this will help me find out, because I hope they/you will be in touch to talk about all this.

ASAP, in fact, because did I mention that I have a plane ticket to visit Israel in a month? Purchased a long time ago before it meant having to consider the political statement of a tourist trip under these circumstances, having to maybe change plans so as to avoid southern Israel where rockets are falling, having to figure out how or whether to talk about all this without offending and infuriating people I love. Which I sincerely hope I'm not doing right now. While some other people I love who feel similarly about all this may be offended that it's taken me this long to say something. Did I mention this is confusing?

"If you can't love those who don't love love, then you don't love. If you don't tolerate those who don't tolerate, then you don't tolerate."
-Shimon Green/Yitchok Meir